My Prayer

 

This website is designed as a tribute to our family Goddess, our GURU and our Grandparents…

My Prayer

Oh Lord.

You are the supreme consciousness

You are the universal existence. The very existence of our life has been your decision.

You are the beauty of the spring.

You are the glory in the mountains.

You are all pervading totality.

Many hundreds of years of life existed before I was born. Many will continue to exist..

Like how our past generations came to this earth and lived, our future generations too will continue to live…

The ever flower waters and the breezes, the vastness of the sky, the mother earth and the fire in the Sun are the witness to this.

Whenever I eat the age old trees giving its fruits to us ..I always feel the love of my ancestors and I feel their blessings…assimilated in to my every cell of my body like an energy…

That’s why I love this land ..Where our great grandfathers and grand mothers and their elders too celebrated the glory…and left us many sweet memories to cherish.

Lord

You taught us through our forefathers that

Life never ends..

It continues….and it will continue…

Because…the very life is absolute reality and the truth…

Grant us with humility to bow down to our elders ..as we are here today because

a great opportunity to experience this world..and to be able to evolve…had been given to us

Through them..

Pedapatnam house.

Pedaptnam is a lanka in East Godavari district.

It is a village situated at the banks of rivulet of Godavari, called Vainateyam. The agraharam or streets where Brahmins houses are situated is mainly a single street.

At one end of the street is temple of Subrahmanya swamy…at the banks of Godavari. The other extremity is Mooleswara swamy temple.

Nestled amidst the coconut trees and adorned by river canals that feed the paddy fields…Pedapatnam village is like mother earth wrapped in saree of green canopy.

Paddy fields, cattle and coconut trees make a perfect combination of sweetness of pongal.

Child hood memories.

Childhood is so precious and the memories carefully hidden in the tender hearts are more precious.

I remember the fact that many years ago we needed a horse cart to go inside the village, pedapatnam ..the narrow road that lead to the village is adorned on either side by canals and paddy fields.

The hay stocks and cattle, palm trees and coconut trees… music of the birds and sweetness of the breezes are fresh in my memories.

I remember I was playing with many of my cousins in and around the ancestral house.

I remember the biscuit hawker in a cart led by four wheels, ringing the bell and selling multicolour biscuits, all children gathered around ..looking for the mercy of at least one of the uncles… ( pedananalu and babai lu) to pay for the biscuits.

I also remember children quarrelling for the pumpkin shaped attractive door knob of the house…that was detached and has the potential to make a perfect treasure for an innocent child.

The house has got ..a corridor outside with steps leading in to the street. On either side of entrance there were 2 sofa like cement constructions..that served their best to make a small slide for little girls .I remember sliding from them.

I remember walking in that street holding my grandfather’s hand…to a neighbourhood house.

The land lady offered me a piece of jaggery..i ate it with great reverence..the taste is not less than a swiss chocolate.

The best part of the house..that I loved was a MANDUVA.

A square shaped area ..with a water drain..and open top in the middle of the living room. It was decorated at the top with colourful mirrors. ..when sun shines..the reflections of different colours on the tender skin…made my innocent moments so bright and memorable.

Towards right side there was a bedroom with a wooden cot with is pretty high and looked very royal. Its called PANDIRI PETTI MANCHAM.

Climbing the cot and sitting there is like ascent of a throne.  Next to the room there was an open space with a guava tree.

Attached to the kitchen was a store room with loads of food stored in bags.

The kitchen utensils are made of brass..beyond the kitchen there was a cowshed and much beyond it was a backyard garden…

There was a well to one side..the garden is full of coconut trees and wood apple trees. Midst of the garden sits a bushy princess like lemon tree.

There must be some mango trees as well. Most important is there was a tree who witnessed generations and who continue to bless us with its fruit is.. a big tamarind tree. The tamarind has got tinge of sweetness and delicious.. there were flowering plants as well.

There was a jack tree…who serves prefect Andhra dish..panasapottu koora.

I remember seeing…my small cousins taking bath in the open bath …by the side of the well

Frankly I didi not remember the lunches and dinners but the fun fact was..the coffee decoction was made in a big vessels that serves to store water ..and remember the stove was … (KATTE POYYI)

Sometimes I used to listen with wonder what elders used to sit and chat for hours together.

I loved the house…

Grandmother.

Nannammagaru..

You must see her grace and beauty in the black and white picture holding a baby..and sitting by the side of my handsome grandfather.

I saw her as an elderly woman without teeth, wearing colourful cotton sarees with gold boarder.

She had a hair knotted with flowers hung to it, and her ankles are adorned by thick silver KADIYALU.

I remember her seeing in our house at Bommur.

There are 2 questions unanswered to me when I was a child, may be around 5 year’s age.

She used to sleep on a cot in the living room with eyes closed but her hands working with a hand fan made of palm leaf. How is it possible? I could not comprehend .synergy between .sleeping eyes and working hands..

Also as  a child I sat in deepest contemplation with in myself after I understood that she passed away…

I was thinking of her…My question was..is death painful?? I was trying to relate it to ant bite…thorn prick..etc that I had experienced in my 5 years life.

I did not like it at all. I was very happy ..in Bommur house with big garden full of fruits and flowers and grandparents around…my tender heart was dreaming of enrooting the huge guava tree to carry with us where ever we go..as I loved the guava fruits bitten by parrots.

I heard from my father how..my grandmother got married at a tender age and entered the house like Lakshmi in a palanquin. Her jewellery..and wealth. How she brought up her children..how she made hot jilebis   made of   jaggery

TATAGARU.

I had great association with my grandfather. He always used to wear dhoti and a long white shirt.

His shirt had got a big pocket that can accommodate a small bhagavad geetha pocket book, pen and a diary..his side pocket has a small dibbi with tobacco leave and snuff powder.

His main pocket always used to hide in the depth of its heart, many sugar candies, peppermints, and poppins.

Grandfather’s pocket is a treasure trove for us to grab small sweet snacks. He used to surprise us by throwing suddenly, the candies.

I never heard him scolding us..or discipline us. He had a curved hand stick called KONKIKARRA.

I shared a great relationship even with his konkikarra. As I am damn scared of deepavali crackers…my mother he used to tie mataba to its end so that I can safely burn the mataba.

He was a hero..he took care of us so well whenever my mother is not around.

He tackled many snakes with his stick. He held my hand to everyday drop me off at school.

I never let go any opportunity to get maximum advantage of his pocket for buying sweet things.

My mother loved him so much and vice versa. I used to drink tea everyday…hot drink served in 2 glasses..so that he can cool it down.

He even used to read bible. He used to tell us stories about pedapatnam. He lived like a YOGI.

He lived a life beyond the dualities ….i never saw him becoming emotional.. he maintained great dignity. I was still young and was not a doctor to advise..or to take care when he fell sick..I used to pray for him silently.. I was so attached to him and loved him so much.. only his prolonged sickness and hospitalization made me prepare and adjust mentally for his physical departure from this world.

I was the one who prepared his last meal..i also served him papad.  I realized the greatest value of dignity he possessed and the life he lead..only when I grew very big.

I am sure….he blesses all his grandchildren and great grand children from the heavens.

 

BABUVARU

HH Sri Babuvaru taught universal prayer..OM sarvejana sukhino bhavanthu.

What a great prayer… this signifies universal oneness and wishing welfare of each and everyone..

This is highest state of evolution of a soul and this prayer is absolute truth.

Frankly I do not know much about him but I could see his influence on my father’s life.

Small things and gestures my father did…made me realize later in life how great they are.

He offers everything to his guru.

He leads a life of total surrender to his guru.. and I must say my father is a successful man.

He starts his day with prayer and offering hot cup of coffee to him. How sweetly sensibly, going beyond the rituals and conditions..so unconditionally he taught me in life..how we must offer everything to lotus feet of guru and accept whatever that comes as his prasadam.

Though I did not see babauvaru..i could see his reflection and his most powerful influence from my father’s life.

I understoold he lived a short life like many great enlightened souls.

My sincere panama to him…

 

GODESS KAMESWARI.

She is there in pedapatnam house for more than hundred years..

Tears drizzled in my eyes when I saw her seated in a small butta (basket made of palm leaves) in a dilapidated ancestral house.

TO day she showered her kindness on us.. she is continuing her stay in the ancestral place.

The power of GOD his beyond human comprehension. To day we have a small room for goddess..it happened only because of her grace..

We could not restore exactly what our ancestral house used to be,

But we have a small 2 roomed construction ..where Ammavaru is placed. The whole earth and air is filled with blessings of our grandparents and their ancestors..the trees who witnessed generations continue to give us fruits.

Whenever I clean my pooja place..I clean my deities with lemon and viboothi (holy ash)

But when I received the tamarind from pedapatnam..i did not hesitate a single second to wash my deities with the tamarind…I felt it was so divine and so precious.

It’s my prayer that the place should be protected and the temple should be taken care of by future generations and more importantly the blessings should be continuously showered on  the children of the family..